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DEAR DIARY (because i mean, what are we doing here), i'm back with another post. i think i want to take a year off (at least) from academics to do something real. i'm meeting with john jung-zimmerman tomorrow. he's the head of the upper room, which is the ministry of my church that i've been helping out with, to see if maybe i can work there next year. one thing i think would be cool is if i could live in the dorms with the residents, and thereby require a smaller salary than would otherwise be possible.

it would be at least a little bit cool to stay in south bend since it's close to the family. God willing, ben will be at ohio state for another year OR moved on to a suh-weet new job elsewhere. sarah will certainly have a job by then--hopefully in the midwest--and thomas will still be in toledo with mom and dad. that will be good.

anyway i think i could pitch it to the church councils or boards of directors or whatever that i'd only require a small stipend if i lived at the church and ate some meals at the soup kitchen. free rent/utilities means i'd save something like $300 per month ($3600 a year), plus some food would mean i'd be spending maybe $40-50 less per month on groceries (maybe $500 a year), so i could probably make due with a $5,000 per year stipend. what would i do? fundraising for the upper room and church in general; chores around the church; assisting in sunday services; seeing if we can't get a CSA (community supported agriculture) going in the madison street lot; doing social justice ministry; being full-time house manager for the upper room; growing the upper room and stone soup programs and connecting them with other resources in town; anything else the church requires.

barring that possibility, i think i will apply to the sojourners internship and other internships that look like that. intentional community really appeals to me and it's something that i like about the upper room. i will also look into other church work (especially UMC stuff), diaconate candidacy stuff, and maybe some phd programs at places like duke, claremont, garrett-evangelical, boston u, or drew (that's pretty much it for phd-granting UMC schools).

on this latter point my parents have been sort of a challenge. they mean well but my dad especially is concerned that my interest in doing something other than school amounts to quitting because it's hard. well i don't see it that way and it's hard to tell him that. i want to do something practical and real, and more than that i feel called to do it. i think in a lot of ways it's riskier than doing phd stuff, but whatever! i think it's God's will and i know God always sees me (us) through.

other scattered things i'd like to do, besides working in social justice / social service type work:

- publish a book of my funny haikus or something like that

- get involved in community supported agriculture and sustainability

- publish articles about Christian connections to the world or a popular blog on the same

- stuff like that

i dunno, it feels good to say all this. i have to work on an incomplete for david clairmont which isn't due until december but i need to get going on it because it's only a week and a half till school starts. JEEZ. well thanks for listening to me, diary, i will probably write more soon because i need to keep a diary because it makes me feel better. hopefully no one else is reading this self-indulgence... WHY AM I PUTTING THIS ON THE INTERNET